Sunday, December 31, 2017

The Monthly Mix, a year in review

As always, I like to close out the year with a look back on all that’s happened throughout the year. This time around we’re going to do things differently. Instead of presenting sections like hip hop, movies and sports, we’re going to look at each month of the year and what stood out to me the most.

January 
Migos drops Culture and becomes the biggest rap group in the world


When “Bad and Boujee” popped off the way it did after the rain drop line becoming a meme and Donald Glover’s shoutout during the Golden Globes, it was only a matter of time before the trio became a household name. This year Quavo and Offset have been two names that we’ve heard a lot lately. Which is great because before people were like “what’s a Quavo?” and now it’s like “Quavo should sing the National Anthem!”

I’m not from Atlanta, nor have I ever lived there, but I can imagine Culture’s success did something for the city. Given Atlanta’s chokehold on hip hop and pop culture, it only made sense for the Falcons to have a spectacular season as well.

February 
The Falcons choke 

Just when it seemed that teams blowing decisive leads was a phenomenon left in 2016 (see 2016 NBA Western Conference Finals, 2016 NBA Finals, and 2016 MLB World Series), the Falcons blow a 25 point lead to the New England Patriots in Super Bowl 51.

I saw the whole think unfold and it was truly a sad sight to see. I was rooting for the Dirty Birds but towards the end I felt that they deserved to hold that L simply for allowing the Pats to comeback like that. That game added another story to the legend of Tom Brady in a season that saw him serve a four-game suspension for Deflategate.

If the Falcons won the Super Bowl and dominated the sports world, after all that Atlanta had already dominated at that point, oh man, that would’ve been special.

Future releases Future

If there’s any fanbase that shouldn’t complain it’s the Future Hive. This year Future released two albums in two weeks as well as a collab project with Young Thug. It was a busy year for the FreeBand Bandit to say the least. The highlight of it was “Mask Off,” Future’s biggest record to date. With all the bangers Future has in his catalog, who would’ve thought that his highest charting single would feature flutes and Future saying two drugs repeatedly.

March
UNC won the national Championship. Been a fan since 2011 when Anthony Davis was the biggest name in the college hoops and have seen a fair share of ups and downs. This one is for the books especially after the tragedy of last year’s championship which was easily one of the top five heartbreaking moments I’ve experienced.

Fun fact for those who care: Sunshine’s favorite number is 11, and last year, I had the idea of getting us matching Brice Johnson jerseys since he’s pretty much the only #11 in basketball who I care for.
Kennedy stepped up especially after scrubbing it up in last year’s game. All those guys, it was great to see their journey. When I was in high school I would talk to my friends about the incoming prospects coming into our respective teams and I remember giving scouting reports on Kennedy Meeks, Isaiah Hicks and Luke Maye. I remember seeing Joel Berry play Grayson Allen when they were both in high school. It was crazy seeing the team win the Natty after everything we’ve went through together. That was the first time I reveled in the victory of a team I support as opposed to a player. When it comes to sports I’m usually a fan of a select few athletes and not teams, UNC and
FSU are the exception.

FSU also got far in the tournament, well let me rephrase, they got to the tournament which is farther than we’ve been in the past 5 or so years. We beat FGCU in the first round and got spanked by Xavier in the round of 32 much to my disappointment. This season I predict the Noles will go to the Sweet Sixteen. It’s a bold prediction but here me out: we have the talent, the depth and most importantly, the attitude. There are no superstar, NBA draft lottery bound players on our team which means, everyone is fully invested in this season right in front of them. Everyone on the team knows their role and acts on it well, nobody is going to try an be a hero by themselves. That is the recipe for a team to get far in tournament. 

More Life comes out and Drake takes a break
2017 for Drake’s career was like the last couple of loops in a roller coaster before things wind down. That’s not a bad thing, it’s been a great ride, but we’ve seen it’s peak. More Life exemplifies that by giving us the Four Drakes that we’ve come to know and love and hate.

1. Drake with the bars: “Free Smoke,” “Can’t Have Everything,” and “Do Not Disturb”
2. Pandering to the ladies Drake: “Madiba Riddim,” “Blem,” and “Since Way Back.”
3. Easy listening Drake: “Passionfruit” and “Get It Together”
4. Drake who makes us cringe, squint and say “why?”: “No Long Talk,” “Teenage Fever,” and “KMT.”

In 2014 my cousin’s friend said that we know what to expect from his stand-up specials now. He’s going to talk about his kids, fame and being short. For the most part she’s right. The same can be said about Drake. There’s no layer beyond the Four Drakes and we’ve accepted that because he delivers, and his stats are hard to compete with.

The thing about Kevin Hart which is also all too similar to Drake is that when a comedian like Dave Chappelle comes back in the mix, people quickly discredit Kevin as if he’s a sellout who isn’t true to the game. Drake’s Dave Chappelle is Kendrick Lamar, someone who may not have the numbers Drake has, but will always have the support of the hip hop community because of his growth, artistry and integrity.

During this year for the first time since like the 2000s Drake wasn’t on the Billboard Hot 100. I’m sure he’ll be back next year; he said so in “Do Not Disturb.” At least we have these 22 tracks to hold us over. 

My basketball career takes a(nother) crushing blow

Every time I get badly injured when playing basketball, it’s during a play when I act like I’m an NBA superstar. In this case I thought I was Russell Westbrook. It happened during an IM game and Sunshine was in attendance, so I had to ball out. Before I went down I had a light 25 points, 5 rebounds, and 8 assists. My team came through in the end and we won the game but ultimately forfeited the rest of the season. It sucks because we were supposed to do a Hard Knocks documentary following our journey throughout the season. I’m back on the court now after months of being sidelined and some physical therapy. What sucks the most is that I got injured days before I was supposed to sign a contract to play overseas. I was going to be in Lithuania, the same team that the Ball Brothers will play for. If I didn’t get banged up the three of us would’ve taken Lithuania by storm. But I guess tai neturėjo būti.

Sunshine and I celebrate our anniversary

I don't want to get too mushy, but this relationship has been one of the greatest blessings in my life. It's been a great honor to be her boyfriend and I am grateful for her being in my life. She is the sunshine of my life, word to Stevie Wonder.

Kendrick goes for the jugular with “The Heart Part 4”
“The Heart Part 4” came out of nowhere and blew up immediately. With the supposed shots at Drake and/or Big Sean, the “I am the greatest rapper alive line” and the Westbrook name drop, Twitter was in a frenzy for weeks.

The main topic of conversation with “Heart Part 4” is the alleged beef between Kendrick and Big Sean. I still have a hard time believing it’s true, but I’ve become more convinced. I was really hoping the shots were aimed at Drake and I wanted it so bad that I went on Drake’s Instagram and spammed his most recent picture at the time with “IV” to do my part. Big Sean beefing with Kendrick reminds me of the time I tried racing my Corolla with a Camaro on the highway. It was something I had no business getting myself into for various reasons and a battle that I wasn’t capable of fighting. What makes matters worse for Big Sean is the L’s he took this year with I Decided. and that project he had with Metro Boomin.

That song and the mention of April 7th at the end meant one thing: Kendrick Season was upon us.   

April

Joey Bada$$ drops All-Amerikkkan Badass

So, it turned out that April 7th was the preorder for Kendrick’s album, and not the actual release date. This was pretty disappointing, but we were still gifted with Joey’s Bada$$’s All-Amerikkkan Bada$$. AABA is interesting because when I first heard it I was like “this is perfect!” and then a week later I never came back to it. I feel like that’s pretty much how everyone else responded to his album if they heard it all. I don’t get what it was about this album that didn’t give it much staying power. It’s great, but forgettable. Makes me wonder what his legacy will be and what he’ll have to do in his next album to make it a bonafide classic.
   

The Kung Fu Kenny era is in full swing with DAMN

I heard DAMN. for the first time when I was driving home from a closing shift and I was on “Element” by the time I got to my apartment. After the first verse in “Yah” I was like “this is a classic, hands down.” And the feeling remains. “Love” “Lust” and “God” were easily my least favorite songs at first, but only “Love” remains hard for me to sit through.

One of the things that made DAMN. so special was the conversation it fostered. I can’t remember a rap album that spawned so many think pieces and conspiracy theories such as this. The wildest one was about how Kendrick is releasing another album on Easter because DAMN. was released on Good Friday, symbolizing Kendrick dying on the Cross, and the upcoming album will be his resurrection.
For me, DAMN. showed how deep one can go in hip hop while still having a mainstream appeal. Honestly, despite this not being my favorite album of Kendrick’s, DAMN. should beat 4:44 for Best rap Album and Album of the Year at the Grammy’s. But then again, the Grammy’s don’t know hip hop, so it won’t mean much.

Last thing I want to say about Kendrick is he is without a doubt the greatest rapper alive and one of the best ever. What pisses me off the most is when people say it’s too soon to consider Kendrick the GOAT. This is ridiculous because Biggie is always one of the first names to come out of people’s mouths and he only had two albums, so I don’t know how that album nonsense holds any weight to this argument. We’re not going to get another Kendrick. The same way there will never be another Pac, Biggie or Rakim. Take this in while you can.

May
Sunshine graduated

On the night of May 5th I was able to say that I am dating a college graduate. Seeing her walk across the stage was a big moment. It was inspiring and moving. The feeling I had when UNC won the championship was felt ten times stronger in that moment because Sunshine and I were really in the trenches together. So, seeing her make it and come out on top was a big deal and I appreciate her setting the example. When my time comes, I’ll have her to look to as a role model for how to adjust and handle the transition.

June

Cavs lost in the Finals, but at least they didn’t get swept
I wanted LeBron to beat the Warriors, but I knew it wasn’t going to happen. I was honestly shocked to see all of the analysts and commentators favoring the Cavs because they were sipping on a Kool-aid that they made themselves. With what matchup and game plan were the Warriors going to beat the Warriors, I’d love to know. That was a painful Finals to watch because I knew it was going to happen 11 months ago, but it didn’t make it any better to see it unfold.

I’ve made my thoughts on KD going to the Warriors public before. His shot in Game 3 didn’t seem like that big of a deal to me given my attitude going into the series. That shot would’ve meant a lot more if he did it while he was in OKC. But instead, Kevin Durant bowled a 300 game with the bumpers put up. And he has it in his delusional mind that that was some sort of torch passing moment that solidified his place with the legends and yada yada yada. Bottom line is Kevin Durant took the easy way out and whoever truly believes that what he did was no worse than LeBron going to Miami should keep their head in the sand. 

Pretty Girls like Trap Music 
Listen, I know this year was hot with rap releases left and right. I know Jay and Kendrick dropped and stole a lot of our attention. I know Migos was hotter than ever this year. I know Cardi got it poppin with “Bodak Yellow.” I get that. But we need to give 2 Chainz his proper respect for Pretty Girls Like Trap Music.

We can’t sit here and act like this isn’t 2 Chainz’s best album. Like this didn’t make Waffle House poppin for a minute. Like this didn’t inspire people to go and order a patty melt with the hashbrowns. Like this didn’t make a legit pink trap house a social media phenomenon with free HIV testing. Like this didn’t influence people to caption their pictures with “it’s a vibe.” Like this didn’t spawn a tour that had Chainz performing in a wheelchair, getting wheeled out by bad nurses.

Nah, we can’t act like those things didn’t happen this year. Somebody give 2 Chainz a medal or something. The Library of Congress needs to preserve this. In 20, 50, 200 years, when people ask what Trap music was, they could pull this up and learn some things.

July

I retried from my first job

For those who don’t know, for four years, about a fifth of my life, I worked at a grocery store. It was a good job with it’s own ups and downs. I could’ve left earlier, but I stuck with it. Throughout this year I told myself that I was going to retire in 2018 after I graduated and got a big boy job. But life has never gone the way in which I planned. I was going to write a blog about this, and I still might. The main idea of it is, one of my customer service managers was hating on your boy and she didn’t want to see me winning. So instead of fighting a system that I believed automatically favored her side, I bowed out and resigned. It was a tough decision, one that still kind of stings because less than a month later I found out that the manager actually quit. Hearing about that ticked me off because shorty really effed up my cash flow this summer. Last summer I made about $700-800, this summer I lost $300. Shout out to all my baggers and bakery clerks. Keep your head up and make sure nobody ever disrupts your steady income.

I start watching Power
After maybe two years of ignoring all the talk, I finally give in to see what all the hype was about. Thankfully, I wasn’t disappointed. This show is great, I’d give it a 7.5/10. It’s got the whole package: good story, great characters, action, romance, comic relief. One thing I will say about the show here is that it made me like 50 Cent as a person, rapper and actor. Kanan is my second favorite character behind Tommy because he’s the only one who doesn’t let his emotions cause him to act stupidly.
Sunshine and I will write a post about the show in the near future, so I’ll elaborate more on it there.

August 
I become editor of my section

After writing for the school paper for nearly three years, I get promoted to editor of the Arts and Culture section. So far it's been a great time, my staff is deep and multi-talented and it's been an honor working with them. I nicknamed our staff the Wu-Tang Clan because we originally had 9 members. The OG members have their own Wu Tang, nicknames. I'm the RZA and everytime I am addressed as such it's the coolest thing ever.  
September

Insecure and it’s hella good (I couldn’t resist)
Another show that had a lot of buzz that I started watching is Insecure and again, the show did not disappoint. Insecure does a great job of showing pretty much everything, whether it’s providing perspectives from both sexes, highlighting the black experience, or making us feel something for the characters, insecure hits the mark. I’ve been a proud member of the #LawrenceHive since episode 1 and I have converted two of my brothers to the community as well.
 
October

Kylie Jenner is probably not pregnant

It’s simple. Rather than simply saying she’s not pregnant, Kris Jenner saw that it would best keep our attention by not saying a word. We’re letting a 62-year-old and a 20-year-old keep us at the edge of our seat for nine months. I didn’t believe this for one minute. There is no way that Kylie’s pregnancy could be held under wraps. In an age where iCloud services can ruin your life and everybody records everything, do you really think someone with 100 million Instagram followers and publications like the Daily Mail reporting every minute detail of her public outings can conceal a pregnancy? A pregnancy with a rapper who, while elusive, hasn’t been asked about this or revealed anything to a chatty friend? No freaking way. 

Kanye might be working on something 

After a very loud 2016, Kanye West took this year to get some much needed rest and work on his craft. Teyanna Taylor and CyHi tha Prynce stated that Ye is back in the lab. Rumor has it he spent some time in Wyoming, working on an album. This is the best news of the third quarter and it was followed by a stellar verse from Ye on CyHi's "Dat Side." It's honestly one of the best Kanye features of the past 5 years. Hopefully in 2018 we get another album and fingers crossed that it's more focused than TLOP.

Caesar returns with Crank EP

This year I spent a lot of time listening to local rappers like Koly P and J Dola. One of my personal favorite newcomers from Broward County is Caesar. Caesar's first project, Trap Care came out in 2016 and featured the single "Fuego." Since then he's been relatively quiet and he reappeared out of nowhere, dropping the Crank EP on Halloween. Crank features a lot of vibes with songs like "A Stain" "Peephole" and "Shot Call." He just recently dropped another mixtape called Trap Ties which features the single, "Trippy." Be on the lookout for Caesar because he's shown no signs of slowing down in 2018.
November
 I got a shout out on a podcast.
My good friend Eddie put me on to this podcast called The Book of Ye. I was sold after hearing the first episode. I praised Rob Haze and Chris Daniels on Twitter and then wrote an article about the podcast and they've shouted me out twice on the show. It was pretty exciting knowing that thousands of people heard my Twitter handle, but it was more gratifying knowing that me writing about them meant a lot. Real recognizes real and art should appreciate art. I've been a Kanye fan for 10 years now and in 2017 I became a "Ye sayer." We'll see what 2018 holds for my Kanye fandom.   

December

People turned their backs on Eminem 

Eminem released his ninth album, Revival and people hated it for some reason. Maybe I’m listening to a different album because I thought it wasn’t bad at all. If people drown out the consensus and actually listen to the music and give it a chance, they might not be so harsh.

For those who didn’t like this because it’s tame or not as aggressive as the Eminem of the Slim Shady era, where have you been for the past seven years? Eminem hasn’t been Shady since Relapse. and people loved Recovery, so what are these expectations based on?

Seriously, the next time I see a sh*tstorm on Twitter about an album or mixtape I’m going to ask folks what they were expecting. People are hating because it’s what everyone else is doing. I can't help but feel bad for Eminem. I'm not his biggest fan, but he's done too much for rap and he's too talented for people to act like he's washed.

I'm on a timecrunch here and I know there are a lot of things that I left out. If you haven't had enough of my rambling, feel free to comment or let me know what stood out to you in 2017. It's been a good year, maybe not so much for this blog, but we'll do better in 2018.

Happy New Years and thanks for rocking with me after all this time.

From,

Deion

Tuesday, December 26, 2017

A Smurf and Smiley Christmas Special

Happy holidays, 

If you remember from my last post, I published an scene from a Christmas Special I was working on. The special is based on a book that I wrote with a friend in middle school. The book hasn't been published yet, but hopefully it will be soon. This idea came a long way and I'm very excited to be able to share it with you. I hope you enjoy it.

Synopsis: Smurf and Smiley are best friends in the 6th grade. During Winter Break, they pursue their respective Christmas wishes which prove to be uneasy feats. Smurf aims to get a kiss from his crush while Smiley aspires to get a pair of sneakers. Through their pursuit they learn about the true meaning of Christmas and encounter interesting people along the way.  

Without further ado, I present to you - A Smurf and Smiley Christmas Special 


Tuesday, December 5, 2017

Where you been? LaVar Ball and LeBron save Christmas

Hello, it's been nearly six months since we last spoke. And I know you think I'm going to apologize and say it won't happen again and that I'm gonna be a changed man and you're gonna be all like "yeah, yeah, we've been here before, Deion. You ain't sh-t and we all know." Well, since we all know what's going to happen, let's skip to the part where I win you back and do everything I can to regain your trust.

In all seriousness, if my absence affected you, I'm sorry. 

Where have I been, you ask? I've been hustling. Trying to finish my senior year strong so the announcer can say that I graduated with honors as I Crip Walk across the stage. Trying to make sure my staff exceeds their own expectations and develop as better writers and people every week. Trying to be a better boyfriend and ward off any Rico-Suave-Nupe-Tool-Kappa-Douchebag lightskin dude who thinks he can shoot his shot because me and Sunshine are long distance. 

Love you, babe.

I'm also trying to keep my sanity while I make 10 page lesson plans that every teacher I encounter looks at for one second then shakes her head and deems "a waste of time." I'm trying to write these scripts so that a Hollywood producer, Issa Rae or both reach out to me and give me an opportunity to leave this place behind and live out my dreams as a screenwriter for TV and film. Maybe that way I can have more in common with Kanye, us being college dropouts and all, and when I meet him I don't have to just blurt out a bunch of  "remember when you's" like Chris Farley on SNL

Speaking of Kanye, I'm also trying to meet Rob Haze and Sir Chris Daniels and get on The Book of Ye Podcast because that's been a goal of mine since the beginning of last month and I believe I'm pretty close to making it happen. Also, I'm sure one of them plays 2K, so if we could get a game in, that'd be fresh too.

We have a lot of catching up to do; and we will, trust me. But for now. It's December and Christmas is 20 days away. With all the craziness going on with school, work and the future, the one thing that keeps me sane is writing. And since the holiday season is in full swing, I figure I write something pertaining to the holidays.

Here's a scene from a Christmas special I'm working on titled "The Smurf and Smiley Christmas Special" it's based on a book I wrote with my good friend in middle school. Let me know what you think, and more importantly, happy holidays.

THE SMURF AND SMILEY CHRISTMAS SPECIAL
written by
Deion A. Sainvil


EXT. BIG BALLER WONDERLAND

     Picture a Winter Wonderland with Triple B's on all of the
     ornaments hanging from trees and Triple B's branded on the
     trees as well.

     SMILEY (10, black kid with striped shirt and Atlanta Braves
     cap) treads through the snow not knowing where he is or how
     he got here.

     As he walks past three snowmen shaped like Lonzo, LiAngelo
     and LaMelo he hears the light trotting of REINDEER.

     Smiley turns and sees a sleigh being lead by reindeer, all
     wearing Big Baller Brand stocking caps.

     Manning the sleigh is none other than LaVar Ball himself who
     is also wearing a BBB stocking cap and purple and gold BBB
     sweats.

     The reindeer continue to trot ahead of Smiley as the sleigh
     matches speed alongside Smiley.

                          LAVAR BALL
               Well hey there, Smiley! Nice of you
               to stop by during the holidays!

                          SMILEY
               LaVar Ball?!

                          LAVAR BALL
               Well it ain't Santa Claus!

                          SMILEY
               What are you doing here?

                          LAVAR BALL
               That's a question I should be
               asking you. This here is my holiday
               estate. My, Big Baller Wonderland,
               if you will

                          SMILEY
               What is this place?

                          LAVAR BALL
               I just told you what it is! Now,
               are you gonna hop in or keeping
               freezing your butt off walking in
               all this snow?

     Smiley accepts Lavar's invitation. Lavar is all smiles as
     they ride along.

                          SMILEY
               Where are we going?

                          LAVAR BALL
               Don't worry, we'll be someplace
               warm. But that's not why you're
               here though

                          SMILEY
               It isn't?

                          LAVAR BALL
               Word on the street is you and your
               old man got into it on account of
               the ZO2s.

                          SMILEY
                    (looking down)
               Yeah, I wanted a pair for
               Christmas, but he won't buy them

                          LAVAR BALL
               And why is that?

                          SMILEY
               Because they're too expensive

                          LAVAR BALL
               Yeah them ZO2s do cost a pretty
               penny. Trust me, I would know

                          SMILEY
               But I told him I didn't want
               anything else except for those and
               he doesn't even have to get me
               anything for my birthday either. My
               birthday's in June! I'm sacrificing
               6 months of gifts for one pair of
               shoes!!

                          LAVAR BALL
               Sounds like he wasn't too
               interested in your proposal

                          SMILEY
               It's not fair! All I want for
               Christmas is to be a Big Baller and
               my dad won't let that happen. I
               told him I'll buy the shoes myself
               and won't get him anything.

                          LAVAR BALL
               Naw, naw, that's not ALL that you
               said

                          SMILEY
               What?

                          LAVAR BALL
               What else did you say? C'mon,
               finish the story

                          SMILEY
               I told him 'thanks for ruining my
               Christmas' and I walked away.

                          LAVAR BALL
               And do you think that was a nice
               thing to say?

                          SMILEY
               I mean, no, but it wasn't that bad.
               Kids say worse things to their
               parents all the time.

                          LAVAR BALL
               That may be true, but I'll tell you
               one thing, if any of my boys ever
               told me that they'd be getting
               busted lips for Christmas. And
               that's a gift they'd get early!
               Mhmm whoopings all around! The Big
               Baller Belt will be the gift that
               keeps on giving!

                          SMILEY
               So is that why I'm here?

                          LAVAR BALL
               Smiley, what you said to your
               father was uncool and
               disrespectful. And we don't do
               either of those here. See, a part
               of the Big Baller Brand and being a
               Big Baller isn't just the apparel,
               it's the attitude as well.

                          SMILEY
               I never knew it was that deep.

                          LAVAR BALL
               Of course it is! Those Triple B's
               stand for something! It ain't just
               a logo like a Crocodile, or a man
               on a pony and all those other
               brands I can't say because of
               copyright. The Triple B's exhibit
               character, and the true meaning of
               Christmas

                          SMILEY
               The birth of Jesus?

                          LAVAR BALL
                    (reconsidering)
               Okay... one of the true meanings of
               Christmas. You're going to learn,
               what being a Big Baller is really
               all about.

     They arrive at a luxurious log cabin.

     LaVar hops out of the sleigh and frees the reindeer to take
     them to the stable.

                          SMILEY
               Where are we?

                          LAVAR BALL
               I told you we're going somewhere
               warm. Go on inside, I gotta take
               care of these reindeer.


     INT. BIG BALLER TRAINING FACILITY

     Smiley walks in to a hallway with purple and gold marble
     floors and large portraits of the Ball brothers in action and
     occasional portraits of LaVar in Red Auerbach fashion, cigar
     and all.

     The thuds of a basketball can be heard in a nearby court.


     INT. BASKETBALL COURTS

     Smiley walks further inside to see double doors wide open
     revealing LONZO BALL getting shots up.

     Smiley stands with his mouth agape at the sight of him before
     entering.

                          SMILEY
               Oh my gosh, you're Lonzo Ball!

                          LONZO
               Yeah, can you rebound for me?

                          SMILEY
               Of course I can! Are you here by
               yourself? Where's LaMelo? He's my
               second favorite.. Is Denise around?

                          LONZO
                    (still shooting)
               Denise isn't here.

                          SMILEY
               Well, is she going to be here soon?
               I can freshen up if you show me
               where the bathroom is

                          LONZO
               She's not coming

                          SMILEY
               Well where is she?

                          LONZO
               She's where she's at. Don't worry
               about it.

                          SMILEY
               Understood.

     Lonzo swishes a shot and Smiley jogs to retrieve it and
     throws a chest pass to Lonzo.

                          SMILEY (CONT’D)
               Hey, while I'm here, do you think
               you could show me how to do that
               pass where you like flick the ball
               all the way across the court?

     LaVar strides onto the court the way he did on that one
     episode of First Take which is now a popular GIF/meme.

     Lonzo stops shooting and pays attention.

                          LAVAR BALL
               Now, where was I? Ah yes, the true
               meaning of Christmas! Now Smiley,
               you weren't wrong when you
               mentioned Baby Jesus, but I was
               thinking on more of a personal
               scale. Something that you can
               better identify with?

                          SMILEY
               What's that?

                          LAVAR BALL
               Basketball!

                          SMILEY
               Basketball? What's that got to do
               with the meaning of Christmas?

                          LAVAR BALL
               I'm glad you asked! Look at Lonzo,
               every time you watch him play,
               you're seeing the true meaning of
               Christmas in motion.

                          SMILEY
               Uh.. Okay, I don't get it.

                          LAVAR BALL
               Giving. Sacrifice. Putting others
               before yourself. Lonzo is an assist
               machine. There isn't a rookie who
               gets more dimes than him. You see
               it. The flashy passes, the flick
               passes across the court, nobody's
               doing it like Lonzo! In doing this
               he makes his teammates better
               because he puts them first. Lonzo
               could get 50 a night if he wasn't
               passing so much, but he knows it's
               more important to share the wealth
               and get everybody else involved

                          SMILEY
               Lonzo can't average 50 a night with
               that shot.

                          LONZO
                    (sucks teeth)
               Tighten up.

                          SMILEY
               I'm just saying..

                          LAVAR BALL
               We ain't even on that. Look, the
               point is Lonzo places his teammates
               scoring above his. Why? Because
               it's what the team needs. Jesus was
               born to assist all of us and die
               for our sins. Which is the ultimate
               sacrifice.

                          SMILEY
               Oh I get it! So if Lonzo is Jesus,
               then that means you're God!

     LaVar pauses, uncertain whether Smiley is serious.

                          SMILEY (CONT’D)
               Ha ha, that was a joke. Wow, tough
               crowd. I get it though, when I was
               mad about my dad not buying the
               ZO2s, I was only thinking about
               myself. I didn't think about my
               sister, mom or grandma and how
               buying those shoes would affect
               them. I never even thought of what
               I should get them and they've
               always given me a gift. I need to
               think about the ones I love more
               than I think about me, because they
               do that for me every day.

                          LAVAR BALL
               Now you got it! You see, Smiley, to
               be a Big Baller means making the
               right sacrifices.

                          LEBRON JAMES (O.S.)
               And making the right sacrifices is
               what being a great baller is all
               about.

     Smiley, Lonzo and LaVar look around to see where that voice
     came from. LEBRON JAMES appears from the bleachers.

                          SMILEY
               OH MY GOSH, LEBRON JAMES!

                          LEBRON JAMES
               What's happening, Smiley! I heard
               you needed to learn about the true
               meaning of Christmas

                          LAVAR BALL
               Yeah, well you're about 10 minutes
               too late for that, Bron Bron. I'm
               already wrapping up this after
               school special

                          LONZO
               How did you get here?

                          LEBRON JAMES
               I drove. Anyways, Smiley, in
               addition to being an all-around
               dominant player, I pride myself
               most in being able to facilitate
               and make my teammates better.
               Because I've always believed that
               it's better to give than receive.
               And that's the true meaning of
               Christmas

                          SMILEY
               Wow, thanks, LeBron!

                          LONZO
               That's basically what my dad just
               said.

                          LEBRON JAMES
               Yeah, but it doesn't hurt to have a
               second voice on the matter.

                          LAVAR BALL
               That wasn't no second voice, that
               was an echo! Why are you even
               here?! I told you I had this
               covered.

                          LEBRON JAMES
               Well, Smiley needs to learn life
               lessons from his favorite player.

                          LAVAR BALL
               He already got life lessons from
               his favorite rookie

                          SMILEY
               Actually, Lonzo didn't talk much

                          LAVAR BALL
               Lonzo don't got to say nothing!
               Just sit back and watch him work!
                    (to LeBron)
               Why don't you take whatever car you
               drove here on and head back to
               Ohio. Teach your boys some life
               lessons.

     LeBron walks up to LaVar. They are chest to chest.

                          LEBRON JAMES
               For the second time, keep my kids'
               name out your mouth, keep my family
               out your mouth. I'm not gonna tell
               you again

                          LAVAR BALL
               Or what? You better save that
               touchy, Macho act for Kanter! This
               is Big Baller territory, baby!
               Ain't no playgrounds here!

                          SMILEY
               Okay, guys, you served your purpose.
               I learned my lesson, can I go home
               now?

                          LEBRON JAMES
               Hold on, Smiley, I'm about to
               settle this.

                          LAVAR BALL
               Settle what? You can't settle
               anything because I've already won.
               Did you forget? I'm undefeated,
               NEVA LOST!

     Smiley sighs and finds his way out.

                          SMILEY
               Good luck with the rest of the rest
               of the season, Lonzo, tell Denise I
               said hi.

                          LONZO
               Aite, fasho...
                    (realizing the last thing
                     Smiley said)
               Wait, hold up!

     Smiley heads out to the door and the cold winds carry him
     into the sky.


     INT. SMILEY'S ROOM - MORNING

     Smiley wakes up thinking up his dream. He looks at the LeBron
     poster hanging on his wall and realizes what he has to do.


END SCENE.